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"Nah, you want gate number 666, just across the street. Proprietor is a old guy named Beelzebub, keeps a big three headed dog out front; you can't miss it."
"Us? We guard this place, the Gates of Heck. Sometimes it's called the "Neighbor of the Beast." You know, the place for folks who don't return their shopping carts to the pens, or who put the cap next to the toothpaste instead of on it. But if we get our third head we're hoping for a promotion to Purgatory, Lost Luggage Division."